Sometimes I wonder about heaven.
Since yesterday, I really hope it exists. Otherwise where will sweet little baby Sotonia go? How else will she get the chance to be awed by the things that we now fail to notice?
She was one of the several babies born while I was in Tonga last year. In particular, she caught my eyes – because of her eyes, and her voice. As I left, I had this feeling that I’d come back one day, some day, to find her in a choir. Sure, that’s pretty ordinary for a Tongan, but she would be far from ordinary at it! I’m sure she’ll be one of God’s personal singing angels in no time.
Sometimes I wonder about God.
Since yesterday, I’m not sure if I want him to exist. Because then there would be someone with answers, and someone like me would never stop asking. Why?
But it’s not about me.
Sotonia’s family and many others are capable of pulling through the devastation of losing a child. Maybe it’s got something to do with asking less and listening more. Listening to those by your side, your children that are still in good health, and the condolences of strangers touched by your tragedy.
Maybe that’s all Sotonia was here to do. Maybe she already was an angel. Sent here to remind us of the things we should take the most notice of… while awing us in the process with her voice.
Rest In Peace little one – but also sing as loud as you wish.