We always lose
Something said to me that by a fellow participant in a Monday night sporting match that really had an impact. It wasn’t just what he said, but how the response to my original question of “did you win?” was delivered. From a sweat dripping brow, shifting upwards to allow a heartfelt smile that
sparked a separate subtle short lived conversation based around a rebutle that asked me “does it even matter?”. And it doesn’t, I answered loudly in my thoughts on the quiet drive home. It doesn’t matter. But what matters is what “it” is.
The ‘it’ is the reason, the intention, the goal, the unconditional love and enjoyment. To me ‘it’ was the victory. To him, ‘it’ was the time spent with his friends, the chance to use his able body when others lose their ability to function and walk everyday. Also the fact that between constant
weekly losses, their team spirit was breaking but only to allow the small but noticeable rays of progress shine through. It gave me a lot to think about. While my team enjoys victories on most occasions, there certainly was times where we looking for reasons to continue playing than to score goals.
This thought has motivated me to reflect from not just the perspective of the field , but a view point that allows me the see the whole the open vastness of my life. Meditation.
I have certainly lost sight of my “it” for example in dance, feeling the main matter to impress when originally all that mattered was expressing myself and feeling connected to the emotion of the moment and music. Or in fitness, feeling the requirement to look
a certain way to gain the acceptance of others, when originally all ‘it’ was about was never feeling trapped mental limitations that physical increase of few kilos could easily symbolize.
We may never get the chance to have a similar conversation, but I would have a smile none the less knowing you have read this and been inspired to ask themselves a series of similar questions.
Just don’t break a sweat in the process as it may not matter that much.
